Things NOT to Say during SEX...

• I have to poop.
• Smile for the camera!
• Get off me, I'll do it myself!
• This is your first time... right?
• You're almost good as my ex!
• When is this suppose to feel good?
• I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs?!
• I was so horny tonight I would have taken a sheep home.
• Keep it down, my mother is a light sleeper.
• Hey! My friends were right! You ARE good!
• On the second thought, let's turn the lights off!
• I'm sobering up and you're getting ugly!
• But everybody looks funny naked!
• Do I have to pay for this?
• No! You are too fat to be on TOP... You'd kill me.
• Actually, your sister "likes" it better.
• What's your name again?!
• Hold on! Let me change the channel.
• It's nice being in bed with someone I don't have to inflate.
• Uhhhhh... I think the condom broke 10 minutes ago.

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